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Commiseration 3 and 4
This short piece is done by Ancient Lady. Because this part is short, I will post part 4 along with this.
Keep in mind, this is the GW/WK comdedy romance crossover and pairings are 1xR and KenxAya-chan.
-------
"Ken, this is Heero."
"Go ahead."
"Does a blond man work at the flowershop?"
"Used to, why?"
"He's making the deliveries this morning."
"SHIT!"
Ken and Heero met outside Heero's apartment, the delivery address they'd instructed Duo to give when he called. Heero, stone faced, was dialing Duo's number while Ken paced back and forth.
"If he called it in lateish, maybe - just maybe - we can kidnap Yohji at one of his stops before he gets here...."
Heero motioned Ken to be quiet as he spoke into the phone, "You called in the order... okay... to where?" Heero's brow furrowed. "Ken, what was the name of the flowershop again?"
Ken stopped pacing and stared at Heero. "Kitty in the House."
"Hold on, Duo, I'll call you with instructions in a minute." He paused and listened. "Do you *really* want to know how many guys died and made me God? That wasn't intended to be funny." Heero punched the off button on the phone with a scowl.
He frowned at the still pacing Ken. "Can you sit still for one minute? You aren't doing my headache any good. We may have a snag."
"A snag? We may have a snag? Yohji Kodou is headed this way instead of Aya-chan and you think we *may* have a snag?"
"Try to control your emotions. Kudou may not be headed our way."
Ken stopped pacing and whirled toward the impassive man sitting on the steps in front of the apartment building. "Explain."
"Apparantly, we were a little less coherent last night than we remember. Duo swears that we told him to call the order into The Kitty House."
"The Kitty House?" Ken repeated, his face grown very pale. He swallowed visibly. "And what exactly did he order?"
The dramatic alteration in Ken's demeanor caused Heero to sit up and take notice. "Five dozen roses," he said, keeping a close eye on the other man, who looked like the wind had been knocked out of him.
"The Kitty House," Ken choked, "Isn't a florist."
"What is it, then?"
"An escort service. An *expensive* one."
******
"I wonder what Heero had to do today?" Relena mused. "Anything that would keep him from being dragged out shopping, I guess."
"Yeah, whatever it is, Duo's involved. I just hope they don't blow anything up like they did last time." Hilde swung her handbag in a circle around her wrist. "Do you want to stop in and check on him? We'll be passing right by his apartment."
"I don't check up on Heero," Relena said, loftily. Then she winked at Hilde and grinned, "but I don't see any problem with dropping by to ask him to eat lunch with us."
And with that, the two young women made a right on State Street, and walked in the direction of Heero's apartment, two blocks away.
Done by Black Rose
------
"What do you mean he's never kissed you?" Hilde stopped on the sidewalk, gawking at her companion. "No.way." The pedestrian traffic swelled and broke around them.
Relena's gaze fell to the concrete. "Yeah."
"But I thought you two..."
"We're just good friends, I guess." She chewed her lip, then lifted her eyes to meet Hilde's. "But I want more than that."
The dark haired girl blinked, confused for a moment. "Well, yeah...Awwww, have you told him how you feel?"
"No, I've never really had the chance. We've gone out a couple of times, just the two of us, but the outings have been more like two friends than possible eh..possible," she broke off, her pale complexion flushing a deep red.
"Lovers, Relena?"
"Yes..."
Hilde smiled at her friend.
"I...Do you mind if I ask you something, Hilde?"
"You know I don't."
"It's kinda personal."
"Relena...we're friends, you can ask me anything."
"Is it..wrong..to want to be with him like that?"
Hilde's eyes went round. "Goodness no! Relena, you're twenty years old, I should think there would be something wrong with you if you didn't want to be with him like that."
"But it's just...he's never given me any indication, and I really shouldn't fantasize about a good friend." She looked down at her hands, twisting and folding them against one another.
"Fantasies, huh?" A sly smile appeared on the brunette's face. "Just what kind of fantasies are we talking about here, Rel?"
"Not like that!"
"Uh-huh."
"Okay, so maybe just a couple of times like that."
"Riiiight."
"Okay so every time I see him, but it's not like every waking hour, I..."
"Every waking hour?"
"Well, but only once an hour."
Hilde laughed. "So, the pure innocent Relena Peacecraft has hormones, too."
Relena scowled. "I never claimed to be pure and innocent, although I'm sure Milliardo envisions me that way."
"But I thought you were supposed to be this asexual type mythical being - ya know, the Queen of the world."
"WHAT? I am human, just like everyone else. And just like everyone else, I have...desires."
"And one in particular named Heero Yuy."
"Have you seen his butt in those spandex shorts? I mean...even at fifteen he filled them out in ways that should have been illegal."
Hilde convulsed into fit of giggles. "Yep, you've got it bad."
"I know."
* * * * *
*
Sequins and spandex were everywhere, but worse than that was the amount of exposed flesh on these these women that were definitely not supposed to be here. This was bad, no amount of bad could fully cover the situation he and Ken were in...or cover these women. His apartment was not large enough to hold sixty scantily clad showgirl type escorts, and so they spilled out of the doorway in glittering lusty waves.
"No, it was a mistake! We wanted to order flowers from Kitty in the House, and our friend just got the wrong number from the operator," Ken shouted into the phone. "They haven't done anything...No, and they're not GOING to do anything...so just take them back! I am NOT giving you ten thousand dollars, and I am NOT keeping them for six
hours, that's insane!"
Fingers brushed his... He whipped out his 9mm pistol and pointed it, but none of the girls were even looking his direction. In all the people, he couldn't pinpoint the source of the violation.
"Argh! Do NOT touch me there!" Ken swatted at a phantom hand delving into the front of his jeans. "No, no, that is not worth ten thousand dollars!" He threw the phone at the kitchen wall. "DAMMIT, YUY!" He shoved bodies this way and that trying to get close enough to his friend to throttle him.
Heero saw the murderous look in his eye and glared back. "Neither one of us were sober, that was our first mistake. The second was thinking Duo could verify what he was ordering."
Ken sunk down on the couch. "We're so dead. I don't have ten thousand dollars, and they keep telling me that we've got to keep them for six hours."
Heero flopped down next to his friend, and ran a hand through his hair. "Shit. We could call and order the flowers again, but Aya-chan wouldn't be able to get near this place."
"And wouldn't be very inclined to accept declarations of affection from a pervert that needs sixty freaking escort girls!"
"Hello baby." One of the meagerly dressed women said in a husky voice while sliding, unwanted, into his lap. Heero blinked as another leaned over Ken and started kissing his friend's neck.
The room erupted in a strange hissing sound. Heero and Ken looked up as legs and sequins parted, and lips uttered sounds of: "Where did she come from." And "Eww, hideous wardrobe." Worse yet, "Why don't you go back to the Dirt Cheap escort service?"
The final voice made Heero's heart stop. "And why don't you get a real dye job, bitch. Get your skinny asses out of here, before I drop kick you back to the lunar base you came from!"
"Oh fuck." He tried desperately to push the girl off his lap, but she wrapped her arms around his neck and held on.
"What?"
Relena finally parted her way through the last of the girls blocking her from his vision - Hilde right behind her, still hurling insults.
He sprang from the sofa as she met his gaze, dumping the girl to the floor. "Relena!"
Her hands trembled, and her skin was white as she just stared at him for a moment. He wanted to say something, anything, but the words stuck in his throat.
Her eyes traveled the room to rest on Ken, who was still trying to push away the girl leeching his neck. She straightened her shoulders. "I came by to see if you were hungry. But I guess your appetite is too much for me." She turned and let Hilde shoulder the sea of women out of the way. Heero blinked against the harsh glare of the red sequins and lunged after her.
Desperate to escape the woman's lusty attentions to his neck, Ken followed quickly after.
Heero caught her wrist just shy of the doorway. "Relena, I can explain."
"Yeah, baby, he needs more woman to satisfy his needs."
He narrowed his eyes at the girl as the random thought to just shoot himself right then flitted through his head. He shoved flesh and glitter out of his way and finally the four emerged into the outside hallway. They ran smack dab into Yohji Kodou.
* * * * *
*
"Ah, Ken, this is impressive. I never knew you had it in you." A smile curved the blond man's lips beneath his signature shades.
"Shut up Yohji."
"Even all these women can't get you out of your funk? They mustn't be very good, then."
"I didn't want them, we didn't order them. It's a long story, and why the hell are you delivering for Ran?"
"Ran called and asked me, said a lady requested I deliver the flowers to her specifically. I knocked, no one answered, but I saw all these women crowded around this apartment and just had to see what was up. So, what's your sob story?"
"I was trying to get some time alone with Aya-chan, without Ran, ya know, hovering around."
"Aaaaah. I see. So how did this evolve to dozens of escort girls?"
"It was a mix up, Duo was supposed to order flowers from Kitty in the House, instead he ordered FLOWERS from Kitty House."
Yohji threw his head back and laughed. "Sounds like this Duo will owe you a lot of money. Kitty House isn't cheap."
"I know. And they won't take the girls back - they say they have to stay for five more hours."
"Ahh. Let me talk to them."
"I know you like to love women but isn't sixty a bit much for even you?"
The blond shrugged. "Two, sixty, what's the difference?" He scowled at Ken above his dark lenses. "I meant let me have the phone and I'll straighten out your mess. But you'll owe me."
"Fine."
* * * * *
*
He had to plant his arms on either side of her against the wall to keep her from escaping.
"Save your explanations, Heero. You don't owe them to me." She took a deep breath and felt her whole body grow warmer in anticipation of an uncomfortable conflict. "After all, we don't have any sort of romantic relationship." Her eyes avoided his gaze. "I'm just surprised is all. But Hilde and I really should get going." She tried to duck under one of his arms, but he moved to block her.
"Relena..."
"Let me go." She kept her eyes on the floor.
"Seriously, if you don't believe me, just ask Duo. We were drunk and we told him the wrong name, it was an honest mistake. We've been trying to get rid of them since they got here." She still struggled against his grip, anger and humiliation tore at her heart. She didn't trust herself to look at him.
"Yeah, that's what it looked like, with one girl sitting on your lap and another one kissing Ken's neck. But that's none of my business."
"Relena, I want it to be your business."
"Wha..?" She twisted in his grasp to face him.
"Please believe me when I say I didn't want that girl or any of those girls in my apartment." He brought his hand up to her chin. "I...I...only wanted..." He leaned forward, an invisible force pushing him towards her. Their lips inched closer, drawn together like magnets. She closed her eyes, and tilted her head to accept his kiss...
The blaring ring of a cell phone startled them from their embrace. She reached her hand into her purse and felt around for the electronic gadget. "Hello? Yes, Milliardo. No, we were on our way there, actually, I just stopped off to see if Heero wanted to join us for lunch. Yes, I know. I know. Yes, now ask me if I care? Well, it's ridiculous, it's been five years, and the last time, you two fought on the same side, get over it! NO! No, I'm not, but it's not any of your business. Fine. Yes. I will. Bye."
"I should go," she said and pulled away, turning to locate Hilde with her eyes.
'Damn you, Zechs.' He scowled as she got away from him again.
'Mission note: have Duo sweep for electronic devices before Operation Swimsuit commences.' His eyes narrowed in anger. 'The enemy is using a bug.'
hehehehe thats it till later this weekend.
Keep in mind, this is the GW/WK comdedy romance crossover and pairings are 1xR and KenxAya-chan.
-------
"Ken, this is Heero."
"Go ahead."
"Does a blond man work at the flowershop?"
"Used to, why?"
"He's making the deliveries this morning."
"SHIT!"
Ken and Heero met outside Heero's apartment, the delivery address they'd instructed Duo to give when he called. Heero, stone faced, was dialing Duo's number while Ken paced back and forth.
"If he called it in lateish, maybe - just maybe - we can kidnap Yohji at one of his stops before he gets here...."
Heero motioned Ken to be quiet as he spoke into the phone, "You called in the order... okay... to where?" Heero's brow furrowed. "Ken, what was the name of the flowershop again?"
Ken stopped pacing and stared at Heero. "Kitty in the House."
"Hold on, Duo, I'll call you with instructions in a minute." He paused and listened. "Do you *really* want to know how many guys died and made me God? That wasn't intended to be funny." Heero punched the off button on the phone with a scowl.
He frowned at the still pacing Ken. "Can you sit still for one minute? You aren't doing my headache any good. We may have a snag."
"A snag? We may have a snag? Yohji Kodou is headed this way instead of Aya-chan and you think we *may* have a snag?"
"Try to control your emotions. Kudou may not be headed our way."
Ken stopped pacing and whirled toward the impassive man sitting on the steps in front of the apartment building. "Explain."
"Apparantly, we were a little less coherent last night than we remember. Duo swears that we told him to call the order into The Kitty House."
"The Kitty House?" Ken repeated, his face grown very pale. He swallowed visibly. "And what exactly did he order?"
The dramatic alteration in Ken's demeanor caused Heero to sit up and take notice. "Five dozen roses," he said, keeping a close eye on the other man, who looked like the wind had been knocked out of him.
"The Kitty House," Ken choked, "Isn't a florist."
"What is it, then?"
"An escort service. An *expensive* one."
******
"I wonder what Heero had to do today?" Relena mused. "Anything that would keep him from being dragged out shopping, I guess."
"Yeah, whatever it is, Duo's involved. I just hope they don't blow anything up like they did last time." Hilde swung her handbag in a circle around her wrist. "Do you want to stop in and check on him? We'll be passing right by his apartment."
"I don't check up on Heero," Relena said, loftily. Then she winked at Hilde and grinned, "but I don't see any problem with dropping by to ask him to eat lunch with us."
And with that, the two young women made a right on State Street, and walked in the direction of Heero's apartment, two blocks away.
Done by Black Rose
------
"What do you mean he's never kissed you?" Hilde stopped on the sidewalk, gawking at her companion. "No.way." The pedestrian traffic swelled and broke around them.
Relena's gaze fell to the concrete. "Yeah."
"But I thought you two..."
"We're just good friends, I guess." She chewed her lip, then lifted her eyes to meet Hilde's. "But I want more than that."
The dark haired girl blinked, confused for a moment. "Well, yeah...Awwww, have you told him how you feel?"
"No, I've never really had the chance. We've gone out a couple of times, just the two of us, but the outings have been more like two friends than possible eh..possible," she broke off, her pale complexion flushing a deep red.
"Lovers, Relena?"
"Yes..."
Hilde smiled at her friend.
"I...Do you mind if I ask you something, Hilde?"
"You know I don't."
"It's kinda personal."
"Relena...we're friends, you can ask me anything."
"Is it..wrong..to want to be with him like that?"
Hilde's eyes went round. "Goodness no! Relena, you're twenty years old, I should think there would be something wrong with you if you didn't want to be with him like that."
"But it's just...he's never given me any indication, and I really shouldn't fantasize about a good friend." She looked down at her hands, twisting and folding them against one another.
"Fantasies, huh?" A sly smile appeared on the brunette's face. "Just what kind of fantasies are we talking about here, Rel?"
"Not like that!"
"Uh-huh."
"Okay, so maybe just a couple of times like that."
"Riiiight."
"Okay so every time I see him, but it's not like every waking hour, I..."
"Every waking hour?"
"Well, but only once an hour."
Hilde laughed. "So, the pure innocent Relena Peacecraft has hormones, too."
Relena scowled. "I never claimed to be pure and innocent, although I'm sure Milliardo envisions me that way."
"But I thought you were supposed to be this asexual type mythical being - ya know, the Queen of the world."
"WHAT? I am human, just like everyone else. And just like everyone else, I have...desires."
"And one in particular named Heero Yuy."
"Have you seen his butt in those spandex shorts? I mean...even at fifteen he filled them out in ways that should have been illegal."
Hilde convulsed into fit of giggles. "Yep, you've got it bad."
"I know."
* * * * *
*
Sequins and spandex were everywhere, but worse than that was the amount of exposed flesh on these these women that were definitely not supposed to be here. This was bad, no amount of bad could fully cover the situation he and Ken were in...or cover these women. His apartment was not large enough to hold sixty scantily clad showgirl type escorts, and so they spilled out of the doorway in glittering lusty waves.
"No, it was a mistake! We wanted to order flowers from Kitty in the House, and our friend just got the wrong number from the operator," Ken shouted into the phone. "They haven't done anything...No, and they're not GOING to do anything...so just take them back! I am NOT giving you ten thousand dollars, and I am NOT keeping them for six
hours, that's insane!"
Fingers brushed his... He whipped out his 9mm pistol and pointed it, but none of the girls were even looking his direction. In all the people, he couldn't pinpoint the source of the violation.
"Argh! Do NOT touch me there!" Ken swatted at a phantom hand delving into the front of his jeans. "No, no, that is not worth ten thousand dollars!" He threw the phone at the kitchen wall. "DAMMIT, YUY!" He shoved bodies this way and that trying to get close enough to his friend to throttle him.
Heero saw the murderous look in his eye and glared back. "Neither one of us were sober, that was our first mistake. The second was thinking Duo could verify what he was ordering."
Ken sunk down on the couch. "We're so dead. I don't have ten thousand dollars, and they keep telling me that we've got to keep them for six hours."
Heero flopped down next to his friend, and ran a hand through his hair. "Shit. We could call and order the flowers again, but Aya-chan wouldn't be able to get near this place."
"And wouldn't be very inclined to accept declarations of affection from a pervert that needs sixty freaking escort girls!"
"Hello baby." One of the meagerly dressed women said in a husky voice while sliding, unwanted, into his lap. Heero blinked as another leaned over Ken and started kissing his friend's neck.
The room erupted in a strange hissing sound. Heero and Ken looked up as legs and sequins parted, and lips uttered sounds of: "Where did she come from." And "Eww, hideous wardrobe." Worse yet, "Why don't you go back to the Dirt Cheap escort service?"
The final voice made Heero's heart stop. "And why don't you get a real dye job, bitch. Get your skinny asses out of here, before I drop kick you back to the lunar base you came from!"
"Oh fuck." He tried desperately to push the girl off his lap, but she wrapped her arms around his neck and held on.
"What?"
Relena finally parted her way through the last of the girls blocking her from his vision - Hilde right behind her, still hurling insults.
He sprang from the sofa as she met his gaze, dumping the girl to the floor. "Relena!"
Her hands trembled, and her skin was white as she just stared at him for a moment. He wanted to say something, anything, but the words stuck in his throat.
Her eyes traveled the room to rest on Ken, who was still trying to push away the girl leeching his neck. She straightened her shoulders. "I came by to see if you were hungry. But I guess your appetite is too much for me." She turned and let Hilde shoulder the sea of women out of the way. Heero blinked against the harsh glare of the red sequins and lunged after her.
Desperate to escape the woman's lusty attentions to his neck, Ken followed quickly after.
Heero caught her wrist just shy of the doorway. "Relena, I can explain."
"Yeah, baby, he needs more woman to satisfy his needs."
He narrowed his eyes at the girl as the random thought to just shoot himself right then flitted through his head. He shoved flesh and glitter out of his way and finally the four emerged into the outside hallway. They ran smack dab into Yohji Kodou.
* * * * *
*
"Ah, Ken, this is impressive. I never knew you had it in you." A smile curved the blond man's lips beneath his signature shades.
"Shut up Yohji."
"Even all these women can't get you out of your funk? They mustn't be very good, then."
"I didn't want them, we didn't order them. It's a long story, and why the hell are you delivering for Ran?"
"Ran called and asked me, said a lady requested I deliver the flowers to her specifically. I knocked, no one answered, but I saw all these women crowded around this apartment and just had to see what was up. So, what's your sob story?"
"I was trying to get some time alone with Aya-chan, without Ran, ya know, hovering around."
"Aaaaah. I see. So how did this evolve to dozens of escort girls?"
"It was a mix up, Duo was supposed to order flowers from Kitty in the House, instead he ordered FLOWERS from Kitty House."
Yohji threw his head back and laughed. "Sounds like this Duo will owe you a lot of money. Kitty House isn't cheap."
"I know. And they won't take the girls back - they say they have to stay for five more hours."
"Ahh. Let me talk to them."
"I know you like to love women but isn't sixty a bit much for even you?"
The blond shrugged. "Two, sixty, what's the difference?" He scowled at Ken above his dark lenses. "I meant let me have the phone and I'll straighten out your mess. But you'll owe me."
"Fine."
* * * * *
*
He had to plant his arms on either side of her against the wall to keep her from escaping.
"Save your explanations, Heero. You don't owe them to me." She took a deep breath and felt her whole body grow warmer in anticipation of an uncomfortable conflict. "After all, we don't have any sort of romantic relationship." Her eyes avoided his gaze. "I'm just surprised is all. But Hilde and I really should get going." She tried to duck under one of his arms, but he moved to block her.
"Relena..."
"Let me go." She kept her eyes on the floor.
"Seriously, if you don't believe me, just ask Duo. We were drunk and we told him the wrong name, it was an honest mistake. We've been trying to get rid of them since they got here." She still struggled against his grip, anger and humiliation tore at her heart. She didn't trust herself to look at him.
"Yeah, that's what it looked like, with one girl sitting on your lap and another one kissing Ken's neck. But that's none of my business."
"Relena, I want it to be your business."
"Wha..?" She twisted in his grasp to face him.
"Please believe me when I say I didn't want that girl or any of those girls in my apartment." He brought his hand up to her chin. "I...I...only wanted..." He leaned forward, an invisible force pushing him towards her. Their lips inched closer, drawn together like magnets. She closed her eyes, and tilted her head to accept his kiss...
The blaring ring of a cell phone startled them from their embrace. She reached her hand into her purse and felt around for the electronic gadget. "Hello? Yes, Milliardo. No, we were on our way there, actually, I just stopped off to see if Heero wanted to join us for lunch. Yes, I know. I know. Yes, now ask me if I care? Well, it's ridiculous, it's been five years, and the last time, you two fought on the same side, get over it! NO! No, I'm not, but it's not any of your business. Fine. Yes. I will. Bye."
"I should go," she said and pulled away, turning to locate Hilde with her eyes.
'Damn you, Zechs.' He scowled as she got away from him again.
'Mission note: have Duo sweep for electronic devices before Operation Swimsuit commences.' His eyes narrowed in anger. 'The enemy is using a bug.'
hehehehe thats it till later this weekend.