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Yesterday I was flipping channels cause you can only watch the news the first half hr before you get really tired of seeing the same shit repeated for the next hour coming up. So I saw that the Elvis movie "Clambake" was on and decided to watch it. By that time, bubba already came home from work and I told him that the main competitor guy that Elvis was up against looked really familiar (now keep in mind this movie was made in '67). He had short stylish blond hair at the time. His voice wasn't like how I normally heard this guy talk but that face, you can't forget that face. So I'm like "he looks like ummm.....Bixby, ya know, the guy that played on the Incredible Hulk." (I can't believe the nerd in me forgot his first name). I mean it looked like him but I wasn't really sure. When they were showing the credits at the end and saw his name, I freaked. I was right, it was Bill Bixby. After all this time of seeing or knowing about these Elvis movies or stuff about Bixby, I never knew he was in it.
I really need a geek pin.
~*~*~
I typed up bits and pieces of what I thought were the focus areas from the Trent Reznor interview from this month's Spin magazine. I was quite shocked on seeing the dark/past side of himself. I didn't really think he had that much of a problem going on with the drugs and booze but yet, its not really overly shocking the more I think about it.
I have a NIN vhs boxset I bought back in '00 called "Closure". The one tape has all their vids on it (and let me tell you, the vid for Happiness in Slavery is FUCKED UP/sick/gross/gory, whatever you make of it. Bubba can barely sit through that vid cause it freaks him out and thats not even including the VERY naked man in the video either) and the other tape is some live footage and CRAZY backstage stuff, which by seeing that, you know half of them were either drunk or high.
Anyways, I am in a puddle of squee regardless of the situation I just read regarding the release of Closure FINALLY on dvd. The news behind it was noted Oct of last yr: unfortunately, the Closure dvd is tied up in legal problems at the moment and looks unlikely to see release until early '05. We apologize for the delay, we're as frustrated about it as you are and we'll let you know of any changes.
Before I post it, I was reading some of the entries on NIN's website and got a chuckle out of what he wrote for Nov. 4th last yr: One step closer to the end of the world. The one-two combo of corporate greed and organized religion apparently proved to be too much for reason, sanity, and compassion. It's a sad and shameful day to be an American.
Now onto the mag. article::
Reznor is adored by fans, but his parents left him when he was six. (I wonder what the deal was with why they did that) He has seen the world with his band but was raised by his maternal grandparents in Mercer, PA, a small mining town. In the past, Reznor used his material wealth to numb himself rather than examine any of these sources of psychic pain. Until recently, songwriting didn’t prove much therapy either. “I think its easy to rationalize any behavior in any context,” he says. “But when you have success and some money behind you, it’s even easier.” All the platinum records and framed mag covers and posters from the films he’s scored line the walls in here (his previous NOLA house). When he worried about himself, they were there to make him feel big, if not whole.
These days whenever he says something honest, he’ll smile and shake his head very slightly, as if he can’t quite believe his own lack of bullshit. A few days later, Reznor will leave NOLA. He’s putting everything in storage and settling in LA. He’s not going back to where he’s been. “I’ve truly reached the point where I never, ever wanna be that guy again,” he says. “I couldn’t bare it.”
“A lot of crazy shit went on. I felt like I was pretty normal. I’d party like everyone else did, but suddenly you’re supposed to be a big rock star, and I didn’t really feel like I was that person. And with a few drinks in me, I thought I could be that person. If I had some drinks and someone said, ‘Hey, you wanna get some cocaine?’ – that seemed like a great idea.”
Each NIN album has taken a half-decade to make. “Every time, it’s a different reason.”
The Downward Spiral was a critical and commercial smash that has sold four million copies (a tenth anniversary edition was issued last Nov.) The single Closer still boasts the filthiest chorus to ever get bleeped on rock radio. “I handed in Downward Spiral with an apology. ‘Here it is, I’ll tour on it, but I’m not gonna change it.’
Like [Billy] Corgan, Reznor was practically obligated to come back with a bloated double album. And he did. “The Fragile was an album based a lot in fear, because I was afraid as fuck about what was happening to me. That’s why there aren’t a lot of lyrics on that record. (and he’s got a point on that *nodsnods*). I couldn’t fucking think. An unimaginable amount of effort went into that record in a very unfocused way.” And people noticed: It sold only half as many copies as NIN’s previous album. “There was a real arrogance on our part. We said to Interscope, ‘Here’s the new record. Get out of the way. This is the new thing. Deal with it. Nobody really understood what the record was about. The label just threw their hands up.” Reznor shudders faintly and takes another sip of coffee. “Looking out and seeing empty seats in the back of the arena that you shouldn’t have played anyway, but arrogance got you there.”
Reznor spent the first part of the next five-year interval trying very hard to die. “When The Fragile debuted at #1, I felt ‘It’s time to have a drink,’” he says. “That whole tour I was in a constant state of withdrawal and sickness. The success of that record was the first week. Then the label had had enough. It lead me down a very dark and terrible path. At the end of it, which was close to four years ago, it was very clear to me that I was trying to kill myself. That was the path I chose,” he continues. “I was going to just drink myself or drug myself out of it. I got back to NOLA after the Fragile tour, and I’d pretty much lost my soul. I just felt like nothing: ‘Being famous doesn’t matter. I don’t like myself. I think I’m a piece of shit.’ It was unquestionably the worst thing ever. Just lying all the time about everything. I was in terrible physical shape too.”
The main tenet of getting clean is admitting you have no control over your addiction. For Reznor, initially at least, that was antithetical to the way he approached his life and work. The credits on Pretty Hate Machine’s booklet infamously read: “NIN Is Trent Reznor.” The lyrics to the album’s first song scream, ‘I’d rather die than give you control.’ "Somebody telling me I had a drinking problem was not something I wanted to hear,” he says, recalling his initial exposure to rehab. “But miraculously, the message took, and I learned a lot about myself. I learned that I don’t know everything. That was a new concept. Because I was pretty sure that I did.”
In regards to With Teeth. “There was a pretty good game plan. I had themes and subjects. I tried to keep a lo-fi aesthetic running through it, a kind of carelessness. As my brain started working, the songs just started to come out. I regained my self-confidence.”
Just seeing that tattered, ragged logo – the lowercase “nin” – sniped all over NYC in late Feb. was thrilling. Fifteen years since Pretty Hate Machine and there’s no shortage of lonely, angry souls who still want the truth out of Trent. The difference now, in ’05, is that so does Trent.
“People need to believe that I mean what I’m saying again. I don’t think I believed it last time because I was lying about everything else. I felt like I was an actor on that last tour. An actor in a play that wasn’t that great.”
Sixteen days later, Reznor will turn 40. “I look at the years of insobriety as a chapter that’s served its purpose. It got me to where I am now. I like myself right now. I feel like I’ve reactivated myself. But I also find I don’t know how I got to be 39. I should be 26.”
“I would like to think that a lot of ghosts have been cleaned out of the closet - it’s not going to be a five year cycle between albums anymore. There’s another record almost done that I hope to put out within a year.” He’s moving to LA, he says, because he wants to be in ‘the epicenter.’ “Whatever joy I have gotten from turning off the world, I now get from being able to function at a higher than normal percentage. It might be the 15 cups of coffee, but I’m not hiding anymore. I’ve actually returned people’s phone calls, which is a first. It’s mainly to be around peers. Just to be around shit and not feel like I’m on an island.”
It’s clear that socializing, especially with a journalist, is still not his favorite thing. But he acknowledges that it’s become necessary, with survival being only the most basic of its rewards. Family, children, more happiness could be next. “My chances of being alive a year ago from now are much greater than they were a couple of years ago.”
~*~*~
I've been in a -___- *blah/weird* mood lately so that means I can not get my brain to function right to do the writings that I NEED to get started. I have 2 ideas for the different drabble requests, its all up to the brain when it wants to cooperate with me. This sucks too cause I've been stewing over this new Gungrave fic that hit me awhile back and came to me again the other day. Though some of it might require having to watch the last eps *wibbles* and just trying to piece everything together. *headdesk*
Yesterday felt nice to actually SLEEP when I needed to, I've had such a whacked out schedule since this past weekend.
Its supposed to be in the 90's today and the weekend. But right now its sooooo fucking humid, its not funny. We still have the windows and fans on in the house, no AC for us just yet. We're trying to see how long we can go without turning it on.
I'm hoping to get back with everyone on comments and email hopefully later tonight since Fri nights are slow at work.
I really need a geek pin.
~*~*~
I typed up bits and pieces of what I thought were the focus areas from the Trent Reznor interview from this month's Spin magazine. I was quite shocked on seeing the dark/past side of himself. I didn't really think he had that much of a problem going on with the drugs and booze but yet, its not really overly shocking the more I think about it.
I have a NIN vhs boxset I bought back in '00 called "Closure". The one tape has all their vids on it (and let me tell you, the vid for Happiness in Slavery is FUCKED UP/sick/gross/gory, whatever you make of it. Bubba can barely sit through that vid cause it freaks him out and thats not even including the VERY naked man in the video either) and the other tape is some live footage and CRAZY backstage stuff, which by seeing that, you know half of them were either drunk or high.
Anyways, I am in a puddle of squee regardless of the situation I just read regarding the release of Closure FINALLY on dvd. The news behind it was noted Oct of last yr: unfortunately, the Closure dvd is tied up in legal problems at the moment and looks unlikely to see release until early '05. We apologize for the delay, we're as frustrated about it as you are and we'll let you know of any changes.
Before I post it, I was reading some of the entries on NIN's website and got a chuckle out of what he wrote for Nov. 4th last yr: One step closer to the end of the world. The one-two combo of corporate greed and organized religion apparently proved to be too much for reason, sanity, and compassion. It's a sad and shameful day to be an American.
Now onto the mag. article::
Reznor is adored by fans, but his parents left him when he was six. (I wonder what the deal was with why they did that) He has seen the world with his band but was raised by his maternal grandparents in Mercer, PA, a small mining town. In the past, Reznor used his material wealth to numb himself rather than examine any of these sources of psychic pain. Until recently, songwriting didn’t prove much therapy either. “I think its easy to rationalize any behavior in any context,” he says. “But when you have success and some money behind you, it’s even easier.” All the platinum records and framed mag covers and posters from the films he’s scored line the walls in here (his previous NOLA house). When he worried about himself, they were there to make him feel big, if not whole.
These days whenever he says something honest, he’ll smile and shake his head very slightly, as if he can’t quite believe his own lack of bullshit. A few days later, Reznor will leave NOLA. He’s putting everything in storage and settling in LA. He’s not going back to where he’s been. “I’ve truly reached the point where I never, ever wanna be that guy again,” he says. “I couldn’t bare it.”
“A lot of crazy shit went on. I felt like I was pretty normal. I’d party like everyone else did, but suddenly you’re supposed to be a big rock star, and I didn’t really feel like I was that person. And with a few drinks in me, I thought I could be that person. If I had some drinks and someone said, ‘Hey, you wanna get some cocaine?’ – that seemed like a great idea.”
Each NIN album has taken a half-decade to make. “Every time, it’s a different reason.”
The Downward Spiral was a critical and commercial smash that has sold four million copies (a tenth anniversary edition was issued last Nov.) The single Closer still boasts the filthiest chorus to ever get bleeped on rock radio. “I handed in Downward Spiral with an apology. ‘Here it is, I’ll tour on it, but I’m not gonna change it.’
Like [Billy] Corgan, Reznor was practically obligated to come back with a bloated double album. And he did. “The Fragile was an album based a lot in fear, because I was afraid as fuck about what was happening to me. That’s why there aren’t a lot of lyrics on that record. (and he’s got a point on that *nodsnods*). I couldn’t fucking think. An unimaginable amount of effort went into that record in a very unfocused way.” And people noticed: It sold only half as many copies as NIN’s previous album. “There was a real arrogance on our part. We said to Interscope, ‘Here’s the new record. Get out of the way. This is the new thing. Deal with it. Nobody really understood what the record was about. The label just threw their hands up.” Reznor shudders faintly and takes another sip of coffee. “Looking out and seeing empty seats in the back of the arena that you shouldn’t have played anyway, but arrogance got you there.”
Reznor spent the first part of the next five-year interval trying very hard to die. “When The Fragile debuted at #1, I felt ‘It’s time to have a drink,’” he says. “That whole tour I was in a constant state of withdrawal and sickness. The success of that record was the first week. Then the label had had enough. It lead me down a very dark and terrible path. At the end of it, which was close to four years ago, it was very clear to me that I was trying to kill myself. That was the path I chose,” he continues. “I was going to just drink myself or drug myself out of it. I got back to NOLA after the Fragile tour, and I’d pretty much lost my soul. I just felt like nothing: ‘Being famous doesn’t matter. I don’t like myself. I think I’m a piece of shit.’ It was unquestionably the worst thing ever. Just lying all the time about everything. I was in terrible physical shape too.”
The main tenet of getting clean is admitting you have no control over your addiction. For Reznor, initially at least, that was antithetical to the way he approached his life and work. The credits on Pretty Hate Machine’s booklet infamously read: “NIN Is Trent Reznor.” The lyrics to the album’s first song scream, ‘I’d rather die than give you control.’ "Somebody telling me I had a drinking problem was not something I wanted to hear,” he says, recalling his initial exposure to rehab. “But miraculously, the message took, and I learned a lot about myself. I learned that I don’t know everything. That was a new concept. Because I was pretty sure that I did.”
In regards to With Teeth. “There was a pretty good game plan. I had themes and subjects. I tried to keep a lo-fi aesthetic running through it, a kind of carelessness. As my brain started working, the songs just started to come out. I regained my self-confidence.”
Just seeing that tattered, ragged logo – the lowercase “nin” – sniped all over NYC in late Feb. was thrilling. Fifteen years since Pretty Hate Machine and there’s no shortage of lonely, angry souls who still want the truth out of Trent. The difference now, in ’05, is that so does Trent.
“People need to believe that I mean what I’m saying again. I don’t think I believed it last time because I was lying about everything else. I felt like I was an actor on that last tour. An actor in a play that wasn’t that great.”
Sixteen days later, Reznor will turn 40. “I look at the years of insobriety as a chapter that’s served its purpose. It got me to where I am now. I like myself right now. I feel like I’ve reactivated myself. But I also find I don’t know how I got to be 39. I should be 26.”
“I would like to think that a lot of ghosts have been cleaned out of the closet - it’s not going to be a five year cycle between albums anymore. There’s another record almost done that I hope to put out within a year.” He’s moving to LA, he says, because he wants to be in ‘the epicenter.’ “Whatever joy I have gotten from turning off the world, I now get from being able to function at a higher than normal percentage. It might be the 15 cups of coffee, but I’m not hiding anymore. I’ve actually returned people’s phone calls, which is a first. It’s mainly to be around peers. Just to be around shit and not feel like I’m on an island.”
It’s clear that socializing, especially with a journalist, is still not his favorite thing. But he acknowledges that it’s become necessary, with survival being only the most basic of its rewards. Family, children, more happiness could be next. “My chances of being alive a year ago from now are much greater than they were a couple of years ago.”
~*~*~
I've been in a -___- *blah/weird* mood lately so that means I can not get my brain to function right to do the writings that I NEED to get started. I have 2 ideas for the different drabble requests, its all up to the brain when it wants to cooperate with me. This sucks too cause I've been stewing over this new Gungrave fic that hit me awhile back and came to me again the other day. Though some of it might require having to watch the last eps *wibbles* and just trying to piece everything together. *headdesk*
Yesterday felt nice to actually SLEEP when I needed to, I've had such a whacked out schedule since this past weekend.
Its supposed to be in the 90's today and the weekend. But right now its sooooo fucking humid, its not funny. We still have the windows and fans on in the house, no AC for us just yet. We're trying to see how long we can go without turning it on.
I'm hoping to get back with everyone on comments and email hopefully later tonight since Fri nights are slow at work.
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From:
no subject
Thanks for typing up that article. I need to head to the bookstore and pick that magazine up. I didn't had a serious drug and alcohol problem either. I'm glad he's gotten clean and that it won't take him another half a decade to come out with a new album! And the man is looking damn good at 40 considering what he was doing to himself.
You've been doing a great job with your stories. Don't feel bad about it. When you start getting like me then you need to worry!! *sheepish grin* Boy, I need to get my ass in gear.
From:
no subject
Hey there's nothing wrong with being a movie buff!
*phew* Thats good to know though I think I get this from mom since she was always on top of actors and such.
Well I'm glad you enjoyed the write up, I wasn't sure if anyone actually read it. It did take my by surprise that he had an addiction problem. I mean sure, considering the scene and ppl he hung with I could see it happening but I didn't think it was that bad.
And the man is looking damn good at 40 considering what he was doing to himself.
Fuck yeah! He could've looked sooooooooooo much worse, he could actually look like hell such as how Robert Plant looks like now. Time was not very kind to him.
You've been doing a great job with your stories.
What bugs me the most is when I get a flow going, I try to do anything I can to keep it alive. But somewhere along the lines there is a snag and it deadens the mood. I'm tired of my brain going on hiatus. I even gave up on catching up on some anime for awhile just so I could concentrate on writing but I see that didn't last very long.
Boy, I need to get my ass in gear.
*kicks you in the booty*